& my mind keeps racing...

{ Monday, January 25, 2010 5:50 PM }

I dont know why,

but it is. and i'm just thinking bout stupid stuff.

I mean im happy.

i really am. i love my life.

but when i just start thinking, i just feel crappy.

thinking about ej, & c.

thats just all it takes to bring me down like that.

Just thought about more of what me and ej had last summer.

im over him. i really am, its just, i miss it, y'know?

i miss how we used to be so close.

& everything like that.

i just want that back. any part of it.

and when your in the moment, you don't realize

what great things you had and how much it meant to you

until its all over and you just reminisce about it later.

you miss it so much.

i just wish it would be that time again,

and be able to grasp onto what really meant most to me.

but, i need to find something else now.

or just nothing at all.

because having someone, especially a guy,

mean alot to you, can just cause trouble in the end.

least im thinking bout him less and less.

and then c.

he's just a dick.

kinda. haha.

whatever.

im sooooo tired.

and im trying to write,

but i dont have motivation.

haha.

wanted to get my bangs cut today,

but, that didn't happen. ha.